One Damn Thing After Another
You should not ignore a hernia if it’s hurting.
It’s a sign the wretched thing’s about to grow.
If it’s big enough to wiggle
and it really starts to niggle
you should take it to a man who’s in the know.
He will tell you it’s a thing he can take care of,
then he’ll measure it and look you in the face
and he’ll tell you you’ll be sorry
on the day it fills a lorry --
which it will unless it‘s sewn back into place.
He will also say there could be other treatments,
which might include a rather itchy truss.
But an operation’s best,
so just re-arrange your vest
and be guided. Sign the forms. Don’t make a fuss.
When it’s over and your life is back to normal
you’ll be very much more comfortable each day;
and the sheer relief of knowing
that the wretched thing’s stopped growing
trumps the fact that you’ve now caught MRSA.